Here we are in the midst of an IVF cycle. I never thought I would be here again. I really did think that this chapter of my life was over, but I am strangely grateful that it is not. This cycle is different in so many ways and I am grateful. It is still emotionally taxing, but so much better than in the past and here is why:
- I am a mommy.
- I have two beautiful girls and a very loving husband that are my world. They keep me busy, give me hugs, and love. However, this was not true for the first five times that we tried IVF. I remember sitting and crying and hoping and praying to be a mommy, but never truly believing that it was going to happen for us. Now that I am a mommy, so much of the pressure is off.
- My Faith!
- I love Jesus! I can sit and think of a million reasons why I love Jesus. I do not get angry that Jesus put this trial in our path. The trials and failures that we have had with IVF led us to adopt two girls. I would not change that.
- I believe that I will get pregnant. I have so much faith that this is going to work. I feel it in my bones and every part of me. I just need to love and trust that in God’s timing it will happen.
- If it does not happen, then that is okay. God gave me two little ladies and made me a mommy and if that is His only plan for me than that is okay.
- I am not doing it alone.
- I have struggled with this one a little. Just how much do I share with people about what we are doing right now. I do not want to upset people or to ask for sympathy, however I will take all of the prayers I can get. To get prayers, people have to know, so therefore I must let people into my world more than before.
- I know that not everyone will be on my side when it comes to how I feel.
- Some people may not want me to do this. Some might not understand and I have to just accept that and move on.
- I made the choice to be positive…and will try everyday to stay that way.
So, the new IVF me is having an easier experience and that makes me happy!